DECORUM FOR THE WORSHIP OF GOD AND HIS HOUSE

LEAVING DURING MASS
Perhaps there is a need for a brief tutorial on the etiquette of when one may leave during the celebration of the Mass. For example, when a child, or anyone for that matter, has need to use the rest rooms, when may one leave and when should one not? Firstly, there are of course times when there will be an emergency and one must simply exit. Baring that eventuality there are two points during the Mass when one should not leave the assembly.

FOOD AND BEVERAGE IN CHURCH
Put simply, food and drink are not allowed in Church.  The exceptions involve common sense: folks with medical need for water, etc., perhaps choir members and surely little children some of whom seem to do well at Mass if they have their Cheerios handy!  I remind us all that there is a one hour fast from food and drink prior to Communion; and, gum chewing just shouldn’t be happening in Church, and certainly not at Mass! 

CELL PHONES AND PAGERS
Texting, twittering, cell phone use, conversations, especially during Mass itself, and other activities which deny the Church building and especially the Divine Liturgy the respect they deserve or which cause others to be distracted from worship need to be avoided as a matter of principle. We must shut off cell phones and pagers in Church.  Exceptions would be emergency personnel, etc.  If one forgets and gets a call?  End it.  If you must carry on a conversation, please do it outside.

MODESTY AND APPROPRIATE ATTIRE AT CHURCH
A difficult and hard to define subject.  Certainly folks who must worship wearing work clothes should feel completely welcome in the House of God.  Certainly when visiting the Blessed Sacrament for quiet prayer, during the week, attire shouldn’t impede.  Come.  And since we live in a casual era, casual dress is appropriate for worship.  But, neither gender should participate at Mass dressed, for example, for swimming.  If a code of modesty is passé culturally, not so in God’s House.  One difficulty which I find hard to address is formal occasions, such as weddings and even funerals.  Some current fashions are inappropriate, especially when worn proclaiming the Word, for example.  Taste and modesty are offended, frankly, by excessive décolletage.  I’m trying to be clear yet kind.  I honestly believe that folks need to have their consciousness raised: often offensive dress occurs because people are not aware of what is appropriate.  “A word to the wise…”

PHOTOGRAPHY DURING THE LITURGY
This topic can be very hard to address also.  Generally speaking, taking photos during Divine Worship is prohibited at Holy Family.  This policy has wonderfully enhanced the spiritual power of our worship, especially at events like First Holy Communions and Confirmations.  On such occasions and also during the Holy Week Liturgies and other special events professional video personnel have recorded these beautiful events so as to please everyone (I trust!) and yet allow the Liturgy to be carried out unaffectedly.

WEDDINGS
It is wonderful when professional videographers and photographers carry out their work with respect for worship.  The few exceptions sadly are more easily remembered.  The guidelines are fairly simple and, I trust, fair. Photos may be taken as the wedding party comes down the aisle and as they recess.  During the actual Rite of Marriage photos may be taken from the head of the aisle.  Photos may not be taken during the Liturgy of the Word nor during the Eucharistic Prayer and Communion.  Video recording of weddings may continue throughout the Liturgy using the norms for still photographers with this exception that stationed to the left of the pulpit on the floor of the Church, with leeway to move somewhat in the area before the Tabernacle, videographers may record during the whole ceremony.

TALKING IN CHURCH
This is a really tough topic.  In the past forty years since the reforms of Vatican II the Church building as a gathering place of the faithful has had preeminence.  Consequently greetings and conversation now figure as an important part of our life as a community as we gather to worship.  And, were we more blessed with a “gathering space”, conversations would have a natural, designated space.  But we don’t; at least not yet.  So there needs to be an awareness that while greetings before and after Mass are fine, the Church nave is not only for communal worship but also for private prayer, especially since the reservation of the Blessed Sacrament calls for reverence.  There is a balance and I believe for the most part we find it.  One further point: prayer after Mass, an extension of devotion following Communion, is an ancient practice with us.  Respect for people being able to have private time after Mass might urge us to talk and meet in the foyer, or outside.

REVERENCE
I mention this topic by way of encouragement.  We seem to have a good sense of Presence, of faith in the Blessed Sacrament, thus genuflection toward the Tabernacle entering and leaving is beautifully done; with bowing used for the Altar, and images especially the Crucifix and Ikon of the Holy Family.  So: congrats!

ENCOURAGEMENT
We form “a priestly people”: empowered by Holy Spirit and united with Christ Jesus, our High Priest, we offer His perfect Sacrifice to Our Heavenly Father.  You as Holy Family parishioners, affect many who come to worship as our guests.  They are moved by your music and singing.  They note your reverence especially for the Eucharist.  They can see your faith.  These thoughts on decorum are meant as guidelines given with the hope that we may continue to grow together as the Body of Christ worshipping the Father in Spirit and Truth.

God bless!                JFH

See also Sacraments

Summer:
MODESTY OF DRESS IN CHURCH

If the last notice was difficult to bring up, this next one is even more so. The word modest is defined as “behaving, dressing, speaking, etc. in a way that is considered proper or decorous” and its synonym is chaste. I had the experience recently of someone reading during a wedding liturgy and the word, chaste, was mispronounced with the ‘a’ softened or shortened instead of being said long as in cake. I found it sadly interesting that we use the word so seldom that it is now mispronounced. Modesty and chastity are key Catholic virtues; and they are linked. Therefore, before the warm weather arrives and before I should embarrass anyone, because embarrassing folks helps nothing, let me make it clear that modesty in dress must be practiced in Church. Shorts that are too short, plunging necklines, bare shoulders, tank tops may be acceptable elsewhere, but they can be immodest and they certainly cannot be worn in Church. Let me thank everyone for considering this counsel. Adults, teens, all of us, are prone to go with what current fashion indicates. It is hard to buck the tide of popular opinion. Thank you all for your attention to this advice, especially parents for your taking time to explain to young people the values of modesty and chastity. Let us all strive to practice them both because this is directed ultimately to both genders: there are several things that can be in the eye of the beholder: see Matthew 5:28. God bless. JFH